Dating, Love, Marriage

Last week Jeff went to Hollywood video to pick up an old John Wayne movie- The Seekers. It was good. But that is not what this post is about. I asked him to please pick up Fireproof while he was there, because I'd been wanting to see it, and RedBox doesn't have it either. So he did, and we eventually found the chance to watch it. It wasn't quite what I was expecting. I was expecting a bit more firefighter drama, a bit less forthright Christian messages. But it was a very good movie. So this post is some of the thoughts that I have had lately regarding the most important, yet bizzarrely controversial, subject in the world. MARRIAGE.

Marriage is ordained of God between a man and a woman. Love is not an emotion, love is a commitment. Love is work. There are a great many wonderful scriptures regarding what love and marriage really are. I'm not a scriptorian, so I'm not going to list them here. Why marriage between man and woman? Because marriage is not about this life, it is not about today, it is about eternity. It is about putting aside self, and becoming one unit to achieve a higher goal than is possible alone. That goal is family. Jeff and I obviously have the family thing underway- see above photo of 3 squirrelly kids. But marriage is not just about raising the kids either. In the last few months, or maybe the last whole year- with pregnancy, getting ready for baby, taking care of baby, etc I have been feeling internally torn. I want to spend time with my husband, I want to build my relationship with him. But after the day is done, the kids are taken care of, and everything else- there is not much left for US. Or that is how it felt. After trying on my own, I started including in my prayers a request for help to strengthen my marriage. (No, there was nothing wrong, I just didn't want to wait until Willie is weaned to date!) I really like Fireproof because of some of the ideas in it on how to strengthen marriage- Do something for your partner, check in with them in the day, study them, put them first. Wherever we put our time, energy, and money is what we love best. I'm so grateful to be able to put mine in my family, and so grateful that Jeff does the same. Last night we hired a sitter for Abby and Harvey and took Willie with us to dinner. We think we should be able to afford a sitter once a month or so, and then do things at least weekly at home after they are in bed. At least once a week, the kids will go to bed a little early and we will do things without them. We love doing things with them as well. But at least weekly we need to take time for each other. I've heard too many stories of people coexisting and working together, but when the kids are gone and retirement comes they don't know each other. So I have made it a personaly commitment- and anyone who would like to join me please do- to grow old TOGETHER. Not separately in the same sphere of existance but together. I know this post is very rambly and not well composed, I apologize. It was just in my mind. I need to come do another post on an update about the family- and Harvey's birthday! Which I will.