Last week Jeff went to Hollywood video to pick up an old John Wayne movie- The Seekers. It was good. But that is not what this post is about. I asked him to please pick up Fireproof while he was there, because I'd been wanting to see it, and RedBox doesn't have it either. So he did, and we eventually found the chance to watch it. It wasn't quite what I was expecting. I was expecting a bit more firefighter drama, a bit less forthright Christian messages. But it was a very good movie. So this post is some of the thoughts that I have had lately regarding the most important, yet bizzarrely controversial, subject in the world. MARRIAGE.
Marriage is ordained of God between a man and a woman. Love is not an emotion, love is a commitment. Love is work. There are a great many wonderful scriptures regarding what love and marriage really are. I'm not a scriptorian, so I'm not going to list them here. Why marriage between man and woman? Because marriage is not about this life, it is not about today, it is about eternity. It is about putting aside self, and becoming one unit to achieve a higher goal than is possible alone. That goal is family. Jeff and I obviously have the family thing underway- see above photo of 3 squirrelly kids. But marriage is not just about raising the kids either. In the last few months, or maybe the last whole year- with pregnancy, getting ready for baby, taking care of baby, etc I have been feeling internally torn. I want to spend time with my husband, I want to build my relationship with him. But after the day is done, the kids are taken care of, and everything else- there is not much left for US. Or that is how it felt. After trying on my own, I started including in my prayers a request for help to strengthen my marriage. (No, there was nothing wrong, I just didn't want to wait until Willie is weaned to date!) I really like Fireproof because of some of the ideas in it on how to strengthen marriage- Do something for your partner, check in with them in the day, study them, put them first. Wherever we put our time, energy, and money is what we love best. I'm so grateful to be able to put mine in my family, and so grateful that Jeff does the same. Last night we hired a sitter for Abby and Harvey and took Willie with us to dinner. We think we should be able to afford a sitter once a month or so, and then do things at least weekly at home after they are in bed. At least once a week, the kids will go to bed a little early and we will do things without them. We love doing things with them as well. But at least weekly we need to take time for each other. I've heard too many stories of people coexisting and working together, but when the kids are gone and retirement comes they don't know each other. So I have made it a personaly commitment- and anyone who would like to join me please do- to grow old TOGETHER. Not separately in the same sphere of existance but together. I know this post is very rambly and not well composed, I apologize. It was just in my mind. I need to come do another post on an update about the family- and Harvey's birthday! Which I will.
2.28.2009
2.13.2009
Sugar cookie palooza
Well my camera is battery challenged so I don't have pictures. But the kids and I had a lot of fun making Valentine sugar cookies this week. I wanted to do them for Valentines, but we have 2 birthday parties, and I have a Stake Enrichment tomorrow- so it was a bit overwhelming to even think about. Then I had a stroke of genius- the weekend before, and FHE!! So thanks to my friend Kathy's blog and a post about her families favorite Valentine cookies I tackled it head on. Unwittingly I doubled her recipe- and came up with A LOT of dough. Sunday after church the kids and I rolled and cut out most of the dough. Monday during the day we frosted and sprinkled them with heart sprinkles. Which was Harvey's favorite part, every time I mentioned the cookies he wanted to know if we could do the sprinkles yet. Jeff came home to cookies spread over every single surface in the kitchen- you can't stack freshly frosted cookies on top of each other. I figured out how to stack the cookie sheets so we could eat dinner, we read a story from the friend. Then we got out the plates and started divvying up the cookies. We took some to our neighbors, some to our HT and VT families, some to the Bishopric, and to the clerks that serve with Jeff. And had just enough left over for a cookie each. It was really fun. Poor Jeff nearly hurt himself slipping on the ice and Brother Elliott asked me what on earth I was doing out in this. It was very icy. But sometimes, you just do what you need to do. I still have quite a bit of dough left and I think we will make alphabet cookies with it next week. That can count as educational right??
2.06.2009
25 Random Things
Well this keeps popping up. I've been tagged at least twice and I figured I might as well do it here. Once it is done I can copy to Facebook. So here goes 25 random things about me.
1- I really wish I knew why Willie slept through the night that once. I'd be glad to duplicate the circumstances again.
2- I have no idea how to take a compliment. I'm not into the false modesty while fishing for praise thing. So I am usually silent about it or just say thankyou. That feels insufficient but returning a compliment also feels kind of phoney- like I only thought of it because you gave me one.
3- That reminds me, when Jeff asked me out on our first date I had to check with my friends to make sure that I had really just been asked out and was not hallucinating. This was after I'd accepted and he walked away- not right in front of him!
4- I do a number thing too. For years, I would look at a digital clock and create a math equation out of it. I have trained myself now to not do it.
5- My feet are cold
6-I'm a hoarder of sorts. I've saved so many things from my earlier stages of life- not all of it mine. Yet, I seem to find use for them eventually after all. Especially all the baby clothes my mom was going to throw out. Oh, and my old barbies and dress ups have found a good home with Abby now.
7- For all my wanting to be a mom all of my life, it is a lot harder than I expected. My greatest ambition now is to truly earn the title of 'mother'. The one that you can hear the general authorities calling us by. I hope I can live up to it.
8- Someday I AM going to have a Jeep type vehicle so I can go driving off road to wherever I want in the middle of nowhere. What Jeff doesn't know is that he is going to have to let me drive it too!!
9- Oh didn't you know that was our personal magnet? His 'test' date was to take a girl off roading and see how she reacted. He scared off quite a few that way. Then there was me, all my personal reservation was just a front for people I don't know enough to trust with my real self. My dream car was the yellow Jeep a seminary teacher had. So when Jeff suddenly turned off the road and went over a hill behind the elementary to take me home, not only was I not scared- I was thrilled to pieces! Poor truck went the way of sensibility, but we will get another one some day.
10- Book worm. My favorite thing about being a Stewart is no one thinks twice about the fact that I may have my nose stuck in a book. So taking time in a quiet room to put the baby to sleep doesn't bother me at all personally, if I have a book. However, I may end up neglecting the other people in my life- so it is sometimes a problem.
11- I have a birth mark on the back of my right leg. I recently learned I inherited it from my Grandmother Langford
12-My 3 deliveries have all been differently approached. 1st was a c section, 2nd was a long drug induced epidural relieved delivery, 3rd was au naturel in the hospital. My sister and I joked that eventually I'll go give birth in the woods all by myself.
13- Fall is my very favorite season of the year, but I look forward to the turn of every season, especially winter to spring.
14- Jeff, the kids, and I all have hazel eyes. Willies are turning now.
15-Nursing while at keyboard is my excuse for all the time I spend on the computer.
16-Some days, I really miss being a kid. I'd really like to go spend time with my girlfriends and have nothing to worry about. Drink soda through pixie sticks, stay up late enough that everything is funny, then sleep til 2 the next day. Most of the time however, I'm happy being all grown up.
17- I keep forgetting what I was going to write next
18- Yes, I have lost weight. I weighed about 50 pounds more than this 2 years ago. I never thought we could afford for me to use a program like weight watchers, and thought I was doing ok on my own. No scale to say so. Then I applied for life insurance and my rates were much higher than they would have been if I hadn't been so heavy. Since being obese turned out to actually cost my family money I decided it was definitely time to do something. Feeling much better now. In fact I am officially 'overweight' instead of obese now, I think last time I weighed this much I was a teenager.
19-I really do love the ring sling I wear Willie in. I even love the comments we get about it. From 'I keep forgetting if you've had the baby' to 'what a cute little head!' I['m going to attempt t o make one for my friend and if it turns out, guess what all baby shower invitations will result in from now on??
20- I don't do well with noise. I don't mind background noise- as long as it is truly in the background, so I have to stop and listen to hear what it is. So I really hate that the sound system in movies has changed. I like the description that Heaven is all Silence or Music, so NOISE is a tool used to distract us from getting there. So sometimes, I just have to get rid of the noise- no radio, send the kids outside or whatever it is at the moment.
21- There is nowhere else in the world I'd rather be than with the Stewart Family- the whole big lot of us, or as many as can be there. Except perhaps for the times we need to be our own little family. Never at any other time, any other place, any other group of people is unconditional love felt so simply and completely. Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, babies, grandparents. I can't put it into words really, it just is.
22- I really do love the Gospel. Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is such a blessing. I am grateful for the fulness of the gospel available to me and the peace it brings, I couldn't get through without it.
23- I really admire and respect self sufficiency and home making. Homeschooling, cloth diapering, scratch cooking, gardening, full year supply, all of it. I'm working on my own storage and learning to garden. It's not easy in this soil, but I'm trying. Homeschooling and cloth diapering are just not realistic for me, but I still really respect those who do.
24- I do make our own bread, and while I'm my own worst critic and wish I had a more full proof way to get it raise just right, mostly it is really darn good. Especially with fresh ground wheat.
25-I love singing with my kids. I've finally managed to convince Abby that it is fun and good to sing and/or hear mommy sing. We don't have to just listen to the music, we can sing too. This morning Harvey even made up his own song- it went 'Abby and Harvey, Abby and Harvey' over and over. lol
1- I really wish I knew why Willie slept through the night that once. I'd be glad to duplicate the circumstances again.
2- I have no idea how to take a compliment. I'm not into the false modesty while fishing for praise thing. So I am usually silent about it or just say thankyou. That feels insufficient but returning a compliment also feels kind of phoney- like I only thought of it because you gave me one.
3- That reminds me, when Jeff asked me out on our first date I had to check with my friends to make sure that I had really just been asked out and was not hallucinating. This was after I'd accepted and he walked away- not right in front of him!
4- I do a number thing too. For years, I would look at a digital clock and create a math equation out of it. I have trained myself now to not do it.
5- My feet are cold
6-I'm a hoarder of sorts. I've saved so many things from my earlier stages of life- not all of it mine. Yet, I seem to find use for them eventually after all. Especially all the baby clothes my mom was going to throw out. Oh, and my old barbies and dress ups have found a good home with Abby now.
7- For all my wanting to be a mom all of my life, it is a lot harder than I expected. My greatest ambition now is to truly earn the title of 'mother'. The one that you can hear the general authorities calling us by. I hope I can live up to it.
8- Someday I AM going to have a Jeep type vehicle so I can go driving off road to wherever I want in the middle of nowhere. What Jeff doesn't know is that he is going to have to let me drive it too!!
9- Oh didn't you know that was our personal magnet? His 'test' date was to take a girl off roading and see how she reacted. He scared off quite a few that way. Then there was me, all my personal reservation was just a front for people I don't know enough to trust with my real self. My dream car was the yellow Jeep a seminary teacher had. So when Jeff suddenly turned off the road and went over a hill behind the elementary to take me home, not only was I not scared- I was thrilled to pieces! Poor truck went the way of sensibility, but we will get another one some day.
10- Book worm. My favorite thing about being a Stewart is no one thinks twice about the fact that I may have my nose stuck in a book. So taking time in a quiet room to put the baby to sleep doesn't bother me at all personally, if I have a book. However, I may end up neglecting the other people in my life- so it is sometimes a problem.
11- I have a birth mark on the back of my right leg. I recently learned I inherited it from my Grandmother Langford
12-My 3 deliveries have all been differently approached. 1st was a c section, 2nd was a long drug induced epidural relieved delivery, 3rd was au naturel in the hospital. My sister and I joked that eventually I'll go give birth in the woods all by myself.
13- Fall is my very favorite season of the year, but I look forward to the turn of every season, especially winter to spring.
14- Jeff, the kids, and I all have hazel eyes. Willies are turning now.
15-Nursing while at keyboard is my excuse for all the time I spend on the computer.
16-Some days, I really miss being a kid. I'd really like to go spend time with my girlfriends and have nothing to worry about. Drink soda through pixie sticks, stay up late enough that everything is funny, then sleep til 2 the next day. Most of the time however, I'm happy being all grown up.
17- I keep forgetting what I was going to write next
18- Yes, I have lost weight. I weighed about 50 pounds more than this 2 years ago. I never thought we could afford for me to use a program like weight watchers, and thought I was doing ok on my own. No scale to say so. Then I applied for life insurance and my rates were much higher than they would have been if I hadn't been so heavy. Since being obese turned out to actually cost my family money I decided it was definitely time to do something. Feeling much better now. In fact I am officially 'overweight' instead of obese now, I think last time I weighed this much I was a teenager.
19-I really do love the ring sling I wear Willie in. I even love the comments we get about it. From 'I keep forgetting if you've had the baby' to 'what a cute little head!' I['m going to attempt t o make one for my friend and if it turns out, guess what all baby shower invitations will result in from now on??
20- I don't do well with noise. I don't mind background noise- as long as it is truly in the background, so I have to stop and listen to hear what it is. So I really hate that the sound system in movies has changed. I like the description that Heaven is all Silence or Music, so NOISE is a tool used to distract us from getting there. So sometimes, I just have to get rid of the noise- no radio, send the kids outside or whatever it is at the moment.
21- There is nowhere else in the world I'd rather be than with the Stewart Family- the whole big lot of us, or as many as can be there. Except perhaps for the times we need to be our own little family. Never at any other time, any other place, any other group of people is unconditional love felt so simply and completely. Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, babies, grandparents. I can't put it into words really, it just is.
22- I really do love the Gospel. Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is such a blessing. I am grateful for the fulness of the gospel available to me and the peace it brings, I couldn't get through without it.
23- I really admire and respect self sufficiency and home making. Homeschooling, cloth diapering, scratch cooking, gardening, full year supply, all of it. I'm working on my own storage and learning to garden. It's not easy in this soil, but I'm trying. Homeschooling and cloth diapering are just not realistic for me, but I still really respect those who do.
24- I do make our own bread, and while I'm my own worst critic and wish I had a more full proof way to get it raise just right, mostly it is really darn good. Especially with fresh ground wheat.
25-I love singing with my kids. I've finally managed to convince Abby that it is fun and good to sing and/or hear mommy sing. We don't have to just listen to the music, we can sing too. This morning Harvey even made up his own song- it went 'Abby and Harvey, Abby and Harvey' over and over. lol
2.01.2009
What's with the new pic??
Well mostly, I couldn't resist it was just too funny. All of my children are beautiful, and we got some other super cute pics just then (Christmas Eve) but the expression on Harvey's face made this one especially memorable.
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